We don't need your Civil War

Issue 1 - Down among the Mole Man

During the press conference announcing the meta-human group M.I.13 to the world, London began to tremble as they were rocked by an earthquake. In emerging from Leadenhall Street came a large 30m tall humanoid lizard and around two dozen pale, yellow skinned humanoid figures blinking in the sunshine. The heroes leapt into action Hunter and Rapscallion getting the bystanders out the way, while Robert Swain and Solstice tried to talk to the creatures. The creature was blinded by the sunlight reflecting off of The Gherkin. Striding off to destroy what was hurting it Solstice flew ahead and from The Shard emitted a brighter light to distract the creature. Robert Swain got through to the Moloids, however they were simple minded so his instructions caused them to disperse. Thankfully the antics of Rapscallion amused them and they began to follow him into a building where they could be contained. The monster lashed out at Solstice and damaged him but not so bad that he couldn’t fly away. As Hunter ran over to more civilians to get them out of harm’s way he saw The Mole Man emerge from the hole. Grabbing him Hunter demanded to know why he had brought this destruction to London. “I claim asylum, the American’s are hunting us down. We wish to offer you our services, we are very good at building tunnels.” What followed was a large amount of paperwork, after the heroes helped the Moloids fill in the hole.

Issue 2 - The Five Million Pounds Question

Assistance was requested by the police as a well-armed gang attacked a private bank and left local Meta-thugs for hire – The Basham Bruvahz to deal with the police outside. The Bruvahz had used their elemental powers to damage three police cars and trap their occupants. Captain Richard Head of SO19 had given the heroes fifteen minutes before his men shot the meta-humans and rescued the hostages.

The distraction of the Elementals began with Rapscallion pogo-sticking to an injured policeman while dodging fiery blasts from Grant Basham. Solstice attacked the icy Phil Basham with fire and things began to steam up. Meanwhile Robert Swain and Hunter sneaked their way onto the roof of the bank. Ice Maiden attacked Grant with ice and a fog began to build, particularly when Rapscallion pulled a large fire extinguisher out and used it. Robert Swain phased through the roof to get an idea of the situation inside the bank while Hunter was attacked on the roof by the hulking “Bouncer”.

Solstice, Rapscallion and Ice Maiden took out the Bashams while Hunter disposed of the “Bouncer”. Inside the bank Robert Swain noticed three of the gunmen were missing and dealt with the two guarding the hostages. Hunter tried to jump through the back door and attack the gang member there but the armed gunman had the drop on him and blasted him back into the alleyway. In an exaggerated way Rapscallion snuck up on that gunman and flattened him with a large mallet.

As Ice Maiden was getting the hostages out of the bank the three gunmen emerged carrying bags of cash with a rocky meta-human. The rocky guy charged and Ice Maiden froze him in his tracks, causing the three gunmen to surrender.

The police requested further help from the heroes and only Robert Swain turned them down to do paperwork. Casting a spell to save him filling out the forms in triplicate it all went horribly wrong in a Sorcerer’s Apprentice style. Eventually a priest was called in to exorcise the office and Robert Swain was sent to join his colleagues.

They were all in an unmarked van outside a warehouse listening in on a wire, worn by a very nervous Billy. Robyn Locke and her associates had gathered three of London’s biggest gangs: The Yorkies, the Rippers and the East End Boyz. They were told for a £5 million buy in they would be well equipped and rewarded for being the Shadow Cabinet’s army that would eventually take over London before moving to phase two. However there was a traitor in the midst and he must first be eliminated. At this Billy called in back up and shat himself.

As the heroes decided what to do, a rocket was fired at the van. Thanks to Rapscallion becoming a trampoline with Robert Swain’s mystical protection backing him up, the rocket was deflected back at the firing party.

Grabbing weapons the three gangs attacked the front of the warehouse as Robyn and her crew headed out the back. Leading the charge Solstice turned invisible and got shot by his own people and the gangs. Hunter dealt with the gang members at the door while Robert Swain teleported the crates of guns away under orders from “D”.

Rapscallion slid along the long table with money and drugs on it and malletted the nearest gang member. Using her ice powers Ice Maiden froze the main floor area of the warehouse. She tried to use mind control on Locke’s chief negotiator who mentally told her not to be so silly. To be continued…

Issue 3 - The Hyde Park Murders

The battle in the warehouse continued with Hunter, Robert Swain and Solstice taking on the mooks. Robert did cast a force barrier spell to try and stop the Leader of the gang’s bodyguards leaving but to no avail. Rapscallion was grappled by the Amazon, failed at seducing her and was thrown across the room where his elastic body was wrapped around a pillar for his troubles.

The heroes called it a day and refused a call from the police to aid them in capturing the bad guys (who were holed up in a nightclub). The police called in the Super Human Containment Unit of the Royal Marines who stormed the club and collected the glory and plaudits. While reviewing the news feeds they noticed a second body had been found in Hyde Park and decided to investigate that and the power cuts that had been occurring there. Initial searches found no trace of magical or mystical sources.

They were then summoned to Cornwall by their boss “D”. A metahuman was en-route across the Atlantic with the Avengers Quinjet in hot pursuit. America had requested they didn’t interfere with the pursuit. However they were told once the meta was on British soil he was no longer an American issue. The Meta was Quicksilver who quickly got onto British soil and claimed asylum. He was granted it was he completed the paperwork in triplicate and the Avengers were encouraged to fornicate off to where they came from. Quicksilver is now a member of the team. And a photo op happened as Storm and Magneto turned up in their ambassadorial positions and thanked the British government for it’s support of mutants.

While Solstice staked out the park the rest of the group went to the mortuary to discover the withered and aged body they were looking at belonged to a 23 year old youth. Robert temporarily brought him back from the dead and the youth remembered being in a lab, a green man and pain as six needles were stabbed in his spine and neck.

Back at the park, Solstice discovered a man with the symbol of En Sabah Nur (an Egyptian warrior king now known as Apocalypse) was patrolling the area. Research into En Sabah Nur has partially ruled him out as a suspect. Solstice stayed near the area where the homeless people disappeared, he was surrounded by gas and as he fell unconscious heard the grating sound of concrete slabs moving apart.

Issue 4 - Robots-a-go-go

Solstice didn’t fall unconscious (re-write) and emerging from the newly formed hole in Hyde Park was a Union Jack painted Sentinel. It scanned Solstice and Hunter and designated them non-targets and proceeded into London where it began attacking Quicksilver. Solstice and Quicksilver cleared away the civilians while Hunter blasted a hole in the back of the Sentinel.

Rapscallion climbed into the Sentinel and began to gain control of it by randomly smashing things with his big hammer. Solstice then smashed the sentinels face in and Hunter decapitated it. Rapscallion’s head expanded to fill the space and he then walked the Sentinel’s body back to MI 13.

While this occurred there was another blackout in London and another pale, elderly corpse was found in Hyde Park. The UK Sentinel project was approved during the early eighties by a committee of three people – Sir Oswald Trask, Baroness Hilary Braddock-Pyke and Lord Arthur Roberts-Strong. The trio of heroes went to see the Baroness as she was closest. She informed them that thirty Sentinels had been purchased from the US during the mutant hysteria of the eighties. The Sentinels had been decommissioned in 1992 and been left to rust.

The next day the heroes met Tony Stark after a Stark UK warehouse had been broken into by a robot. They interviewed the head of the energy company and found out that the blackouts were being caused by a short power drain of the system. After a lot of persuasion Sir Trask opened up the Sentinel base under Hyde Park but the heroes found nothing other than the Sentinels there.

Emerging into Hyde Park at 9pm a homeless man ran towards them being pursued by the robot that had attacked Stark’s warehouse earlier. The heroes engaged it and two of them were caught in hardening rubber. Rapscallion broke the robot’s arm off, the robot grabbed him with the other hand and said “D-O-O-M” three times and then began counting down to self-destruct.

The homeless man showed the heroes to a bus stop which had emerged from the ground with the robot in it. The bus stop had a telephone in it, and although it looked authentic, everything about it was fake. Then a lighting archway appeared and a magician appeared through it and told the heroes to flee or die. Naturally the heroes didn’t run. A fight broke out and strangely a turret gun dropped down and blasted the magician away. The beam obviously damaged him as he immediately teleported away. The numbers 3 and 6 were now illuminated on the phone.

Issue 5 - Going Underground

While Hunter was hanging onto the gun turret, Rapscallion noticed that under the numbers on the telephone there are letters and typed in 3666 or D-O-O-M and the floor beneath descended six storeys rapidly before coming to a halt in front of a solid metal door.

The door slid open and they entered a room and stood on the royal crest of Latveria while they were scanned by a computer. The computer couldn’t identify them so set robots on them followed by more robots and knockout gas. No-one noticed Solstice’s unconscious form being carried away. Rapscallion was cutting them in half with a giant can opener, Hunter was doing the same with his katana while Robert Swain was protecting people with his mystic shield. With his powers beginning to fade thanks to the gas, Robert opened a portal into the next room and Hunter carried him through it followed by Rapscallion.

After converting a gun turret into a ceiling fan they searched the base and found a 1950’s kitchen and living area with modern day appliances. In the kitchen was a housewife making a cake who was very confused by their presence. When Hunter mentioned he may have killed her husband her eyes glowed red and laser beams struck him down. Robert continued to talk to her and keep her calm while Rapscallion searched the house. Gelda’s husband – Wolfgang Kreigslieber was a nazi robotic scientist who fled Germany leaving his family behind to die.

They then went to the computer room and Hunter ended up shooting the computer with explosive shells, sealing the building. They found the main laboratory with Wolfgang draining the lifeforce of three homeless people and Solstice into the large mechanical man on the operating table. The four people were in plastic pods which were on the end of a cross shaped mechanical arm connected to the transference machine. Hunter shot the cross with exploding bullets while Robert teleported the prisoners away. A doombot entered the room and stopped Rapscallion damaging the old man with his giant mallet. Wolfgang’s last words were: “I will not be stopped, not when global peace is so near at hand,” before he and the robot teleported away.

The doombot congratulated the heroes on dooming the world and then asked them to return with him to Latveria to face down the Darkholder cult and prevent the end of the world.